One Year and Two Days

It took just over a year. I should be surprised it was that long. Rats are smart critters, and the local gang finally broken into our "rat-proof" chicken feeder.  The last two days they've been feasting there every time I glance out the window.

24-hour dinner table

With chickens around, rats are like first cousins, except closer.  Since hens are not thorough in getting every morsel of grain or feed set out for them, the frugal rats take care of any that is left behind. For that reason I built a giant bird feeder that rats could not climb up nor jump up into.

Plastic creates a "no-holds" area next the the feeder.  I will probably
need to cover a larger section of the screen soon.  Fast learners.

It took me two days to spot the rats' point of entry and to put the solution in Things I get to do today.  A large piece of plastic is now on the wall of the chicken coop.  The little critters have been climbing up the screen of the coop and jumping down and over into the hens' dinner table. The invitation to dine has been withdrawn.

Squirrel Eggs

I'm expecting.  That's saying a lot, especially considering that it's squirrel eggs I'm looking for. Here's the deal.

I feed my hens all the right things.  Now for a hen, besides sow bugs, earwigs, slugs, worms, flies, grubs and anything else that is small enough and slow enough to be caught in a beak, the right things are water, oyster shells and "layer pellets."  They drink a fair amount of water.  Hens go for the oyster shells on a need-to-eat basis.  Their body just tells them when their calcium is low, and they head on over to the nutritional buffet.  Layer pellets, however, are their staple.  The pellets have the right balance of protein and fat.  Most importantly the pellets have calcium needed for strong shells when the hens are laying eggs.  To make eggs, the girls need "layer" feed or the equivalent.

But back to the squirrels.  I've discovered that if you are feeding large critters (chickens), everything smaller that wants to eat can get to the food as well.  Little fly-by birds, rats and those very large rats with fluffy tails that we call squirrels all get in line for their (not so) fair share.  If the hens can get in, so can all the rest.

Squirrel ran up the near-by tree to avoid a mug shot.

I would never put out a squirrel feeder. These critters multiply based on food supply.  There are enough of them in my neighborhood that they are routinely seen flattened on the road. Not only is my layer feed increasing the numbers, but also we have squirrels that are off-the-charts obese. One of them waddled across the yard the other day, barely able to run. When the hens are not in the feeding buffet, there is usually a squirrel clamped to the edge, stuffing its cheeks, stuffing its belly, stuffing its paws.

It can't possibly be one of the Things I get to do today, but I'd certainly like to find the nest where those squirrels are laying all those eggs they're making from eating what I feed the chickens.

All you can eat or Chicken for dinner?

“So how can we help you today?”  the big guy behind the counter at the local lumber yard knows I show up there on serious business only.

“Well, I need some parts for a cover for the chicken buffet.”

He paused, “As in all-they-can-eat? Or we’re having chicken for dinner.”  He really knows better than to joke about the darlings at the back of my yard who, though they haven’t laid an egg in a long time (some of them never), keep me better entertained than the best rated TV sitcom. 

The chicken buffet is a brainchild birthed from necessity.  Chickens love grain and so do rodents.  How to feed the chickens and not the rats—that’s the question.  The buffet, then, is wooden tray perched on a post that has an ABS pipe sheath.  The chickens can easily fly two feet up to the perch, hop into the tray and be ankle deep in seeds, grains and chicken scratch.  We’ve never seen a rat even try to climb that pipe.  Pray no one is giving them flying lessons.

Nora Jones dining in.

But the rainy season arrived yesterday, and the roof for the buffet can’t wait any longer.  My chickens are pretty classy ladies.  Singers, they are, all of them.  There’s Gwyneth Poultry (the slender blonde), Nora Jones, Nina Simone, Latifah, and Miss Lena Horne.  A group of women of this caliber deserve only the best.  So there are cedar shingles on the roof which is supported by smooth pine uprights.  Never mind that I’ve never before cedar-shingled a roof.  It's on my list of Things I get to do today.  For these sweet chicks I’ll do just about anything.

Learned oh so much on this part.

Today as afternoon was turning into evening, I secured the last bolt to the roof structure that will shelter my girls’ food, nibbles and treats from the rain of fall and possible snow of winter.

And tomorrow after I’ve fed myself and brushed my teeth, I’ll head out to the hen pen with the fragrance of cedar in my nose.  A few bolts secured on each end and I’ll flip on the sign “Open for business—all you can eat.”

Nora on the left and Gwyneth, fluff toward camera, checking out the business.